I love casting against type -not “type-casting” by definition – to sound delinquent wearing a grimace – I go against the grain. I go against the flow like salmon. I go against the norm demolishing, smashing, squashing the odds into gelatinous pudding. Not to be a delinquent but I’m cringe-worthy; performing unexpected, enigmatic plays; apt to aspire impressionists, receive rave reviews. Theater (not the silver screen) loves to pigeonhole people & there’s nothing a comic hearts more than animating their true colors.

I’m a pristine taskmaster – not prissy – an innate gigolo the type juggling from the jugular every near or far reaching affect as the one & only pioneer of a Standup Comedy Reality web show. I also now do sit-down comedy: both of which are unscriptable. Monologue, dialogue, psychologue, inner voice, spoken word are impervious to scripts. For once, rest-assured you will never be scripted in a Digital Comedy Club. A free Improv Institute. Finally altruism.


The principle & practice of concern for the welfare of others. It is a traditional virtue in many cultures & a core aspect of various religious traditions – secular worldviews – though the concept of “others” toward whom concern should be directed vary amid culture & religion.

À la The Flash (or is it lowercase, the?) I utilize the cosmic aspects of the ‘Speed Force’: walking on water, prying open vortexes, toying with relativity Doppler effects.

I penned or inked my autobiographical film screenplay in 30 days flat complete from cover to cover on November 24th 2011 — 22 revisions — based on a poster-board I once glimpsed; a sleuth of billboards in my cortex.

After learning the definition of the autéur my mind was already made up for me. A filmmaker whose personal influence & artistic license is regarded as author of a movie. How do you pronounce thee? Imagine a Frenchman saying Otter.

I previously designed, then decided I am/ was insane to burst my colon like a bratwurst on such a ridiculous directorial debut to think my alter ego is/ was going to grant me both reins to direct.

No live action superhero movie of me has been made thus far although Tenacious D produced a short WonderBoy musical. Certainly I’m a very difficult sack to crack. Or nut to bust. A big action movie with controversial Jordanian Christian comic today. More difficult than Superman who is as difficult as Batman because in the comic universe Batman is Superman!

IMG_0366This wisdom tends to prevail. Hopefully, that’ll change like soiled diapers.

The challenge for us moving forward is how to depict me in a world like this. Can I solve hunger in the horn of Africa? What would I do with the Arab Spring? Partly you can argue, how can I NOT intervene in Syria? But then, is it a hornet’s nest if I divulge my wherewithal, means, resource?

It’s easier for Batman, he exists in his own pocket of the world, he’s not violating sovereign airspace every day.

I immerse myself in comic heroics foisted with penultimate responsibility.

People think of me as this sort of professorial bearded shadow boxer who paints & re-paints on the optic, cryptic NeverRepeataJoke canvas. If you drill down a little further, you just see a shadow boxer with loopy ingenuity, adding meritocracy by weaponizing insults whilst privatizing world peace on a comedy scene unfettered by mentally ill folk. Read my actual columns – at least those still existing. There are a lot of contemporaries writing about me inserting me head-first onto the rumormill. Maybe feet-first is more proper? I’m a fascinating, mercurial creature – a bit of a braggart. I clearly have a chip on my shoulder as I deserve more credit for the trail I blaze. The game I changed. The ground I broke. 118 humor columns toiled by the Arab Daily News due to copyright infringement. An unpublished memoir of jokes about our timelines – a unilateral lifetime. Congruency. Linear sans the non.

Surely I’m dismissive of your artwork.

Here I am: a dilettante, practical joker as opposed to impractical, in the way geniuses are. Dry, beard-stroking guy. Vibrant bigger-than-life. Movie producers will think, ‘My God, this guy had enough crazy things in his life to base 10 shows on’.

Online I’m the most recognized figure in history more than Botticelli, Michelangelo, Da Vinci. So I say, “Well, sounds like I’m the dude we should do a show about; based on terms of pre-existing awareness.”


Sausage party excluded.

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