We all live by The Word. That’s why our eyesight is able to auto-focus but lacks depth.  digital media in the U.S. will overtake television as the biggest media category next year—a year earlier than previously expected – with $66 billion in revenue. The eye is the prime sense used to take in the world,


“At the end of a 24-hour shift I am jet lag; drained; under par. I can’t concentrate. I have to work hard & really think to get words out. I feel drunk, making me irritable & stressed. The scariest was dozing off at a traffic light. Someone had to knock on my windshield to wake

❄️ Snowball Effect ❄️

“The seminal moment of my life was the first time I stepped into a cinema:  I knew I can do anything. Go anywhere.” -Christopher Nolan If I were to get personal, I say the seminal moment of my life was being barred from WGN radio. The seminal moment of life itself is having the choice to pay

What’s A Belletrist?

2,000 “belles-lettres” are on the Restricted Book Shelves of the world’s dozen leading libraries, of which survived centuries of prosecution, bowdlerizing, mutilation, concealment, defenestration & burning to become invaluable artifacts for scientists. A belletrist, or rhetorician, is valued for aesthetic qualities & originality of style & tone in spite of

Taint of Idolatry

Social media users are diagnosed as suffering from mood swings. Users are subjected to symptoms of epilepsy nightly. Each treatment hits us as a blinding white light wherein lies our genius. To embrace our own psychic carnage & be content with the content we create with all five of our senses. See, hear, touch the words

No Yoda In Ioda

NeverRepeatAJoke is a hierarchial blueprint to make joke-telling a digital means for conveying artists’ interior anguish. YouTube-level aphorisms. I am a grab-bag of dramatic elements lending soul & fire to the sight of a man reading from a pen & pad. Masterful deadpan performances as the gaunt, aging eminence who rubs a Genie lamp. I make

V For Vendet- My Ass

Do not stand with impatience what a chapter of incidents may produce in your favor. Brutal honesty is the shortest distance of communication between among a community … Get in their grill. The question is: Do you know how to take culture out of context to see propaganda for what it is? Like paranoia, there is no

We Need Jon Stewart

Being “humorous” isn’t enough, not if you’re occupying valuable space on a medium where 50K videos are being viewed per second (imagine 50K clicks per second). The average user retention is 25 minutes. One needs to remain relevant; to uncork our repressed longing for personal expression. More video content is uploaded to YouTube in 30 days

No More Space In Space

We joke with naivete since we believe we can make it (as in making a living). The fusillade of neural activity triggered by a new experience adjusts the brain’s connections—neurons are strengthened if those cells communicate frequently. The notoriety of fame eventually corrodes our/ the sense of humor. Let me give it to you straight whether

“Breaking News”

Silence is knowing someone’s pain. When you develop the cognition to absorb negative energy & criticism minus the provocation to ignite your wick – only then can you understand the labels of maturity & education. Very Ying Yang of me. Yes. Psychologists & the British refer to that term as “Bent.” I call it the ‘Say


Victorian door frames are visible from the corner blocks. Comedians rush from the hotel lobby, I trot next to them – even try to weave between them. In order to secure my place on this show, I need to be as close to them as possible. Mismatched antique drawers built into the wasted space beneath the

Truth Behind 31 Proverbs

Proverbs 26:3 Says Take a rod to the backs of fools. Then goes on to have a polar opposite message. Fools diminish our ability to discern truth from error, yet we expose our folly bound up in the hearts of children. It always rains & it never pours. Fools are harmless with good intentions. We evoke pity

5 Signs You’re A YouTuber

Time spent on mobile devices has grown to 199 minutes per day on average, surpassing time spent with the TV, which is a flat 150 minutes per day. No wonder YouTubers see it as a shootout competition: You’re given a set time & narrative parameters under which all the pressure gravitates towards an imaginary pebble in

The Truth About SuperMom

For those of you familiar with the Renaissance, the knights in shining armor are no longer. Nowadays a man is just one of the boys. Have taste. Be real. The chivalrous are whom Katt Williams terms “fake bitches.” Tampax is running “Be Strong” ads now. The pink ribbon Breast Cancer Awareness has inundated your local pharmacy. Hillary Clinton


The word Grapest is odd! I found the definition to “Grapest.” The act of forcefully shoving grapes down the throat of an unwilling victim. Just imagine a family asleep in their respective bedroom. Meantime a grapest busts your door in, baggie in hand: “IMMA GRAPE YOU IN DA MOUTH!”   Q: How many police officers does it take to help the

Calliope Gone Haywire Under A 1-Ton Fart

The Chief of all Muses, Calliope (Ancient Greek: Καλλιόπη, “beautiful voice” or “of good face”) is the muse who presides over eloquence. So called for her ecstatic harmony of voice. The wisest of Muses, to have defeated the daughters of the king of Thessaly in a singing match & then, to punish their presumption, turned

Taliban Twerking

You would think the worst of the recession are people saying that you cannot talk to them unless you pay them! A nickel a word to ass-u-me you’re worth your weight (either in gold, salt, water or another substance). Now we have taken the next steps from swallowing a spoonful of cinnamon to planking to the

The “Litmus Test”

What the Hell kind of irony is “Radical Feminism”? The mere question implies you (my reader) have an air of bigotry. Our transgressions, which is a joining of the words “sexual aggressions” can be weeded out of a community, from family to family, confounding pundits & oddsmakers. Women have “insert insult here” stamped on their foreheads: regardless of

Jokes are Chocolate Steaks

Now, here I am, faced with the chance to be on camera; my audience submerged in pitch black. I see it is really the opportunity to illicit comedy. The subversive thrill of infiltration is the draw, though as I age, curiosity kills the cat. 9 times. I’m not a comedian by definition. Part of me wants recognition, wants someone

My Jokes Are Your Jokes

What excels your creativity? My web series offers 887 jokes in video format. offers all of his jokes to the public. Digital thieves go unnoticed. Though deemed unsavory, joke thievery is widespread with the advent of the Internet. A comic doesn’t just have to worry about other comics stealing his jokes now, but also

Funny $ To quote Wyclef Jean, “I got nothing but funny money.” Money is funny. You want to be tight-fisted? You have to be tight-fisted. You want to be frugal? You’ll be called out. I don’t complain. I attain beast-mode on-stage while instilling harmony. Volume & defense overlapping. Standup is not about talent as there is no validation.

I Love My Fanz

Sentiment is the value that comes from emotion or experience. Your sentimental value speaks to your function & attractiveness; it has prompted you to maintain your hygiene & manage your property. This registers self-worth & self-esteem. You grow a sense of pride & infiltrate the dynamics of respect. Sentimentality is the basis of all conversation across

The End of the “Idea”

Take the microphone out of the stand; move it out of the way. Acknowledge the crowd & say something engaging to bring them in & help them escape on a magic carpet ride. Use that moment during your first laugh break to put the mic stand behind you without breaking the connection you just established

Guinness Book of World Record Breaker

1. What do you think of the word “comedienne?” It’s silly. Any time someone is identified or classified as a “female comedian,” “Comedienne,” or other gender/race/religion/orientation distinctions, you’re subconsciously qualifying anything you say about that person. If I refer to someone as “a very funny female comedian” I’m bringing gender into a conversation where it does

Jokes On Me – April Fool’s Day

If you have diplomatic chops, you will penetrate an audience. That reaction creates a chemical cascade & reaches into the nuclei of human cells, & turns on genes & build up muscle in response to your environmental challenge. That’s why you tell more & more jokes. To give your life meaning & influence, sending neurotransmitters

Why You Should NEVER Do Comedy?

I wrote about this bi-weekly for my column at the Arab Daily News. No one understands the plight of a comedian unless you get your hands dirty like me. There are 60,000 in L.A. There are just as much as in Chicago. We are just trying to be ourselves. Does anyone care? Do you care? Is

The Real Patch Adams

It’s democratic.  If you’re good you’re good.  You can become a celebrity overnight.  What defines a professional?  Did Jesus practice in becoming a preacher or hired as a spokesperson or have a degree in public relations?  No he was born with it.  It was a gift.  It is a gift. The door to your house closes,

Seeds of Stand-up Comedy

 The monologue is a comedy trend, with hot puns & fresh jokes drawn from daily news, real-life, cloak politics, idle threats. Add moxie for the laugh-line otherwise known as punch-line.  An everyman approach. Combine topical subject matter with rapid-fire gag rhythms of a vaudeville quipster.  Create a logical heir.  Educational TV.  Like my dad says, “It